[Lupin1]

A helpful guide for any southerner thinking about coming to visit us up here in New England.

New England Temperature Conversion Chart

60 above zero
New Yorkers try to turn on the heat....
People in New England plant gardens.

50 above zero
Californians shiver uncontrollably.......
People in New England sunbathe.

40 above
Italian cars won't start.....
New Englanders drive with the windows down.

32 above
Distilled water freezes.....
New England water gets thicker.

20 above
Floridians wear coats, gloves and woolly hats.....
People in NE throw on a sweatshirt.

15 above
New York landlords finally turn up the heat....
People in NE have the last cook-out before it gets cold.

zero degrees
People in Miami cease to exist....
New Englanders lick the flagpole.

-20 below
Californians fly away to Mexico....
People in NE get out their winter coats.

-40 below
Hollywood disintergrates.....
The girl scouts in New England begin selling cookies door to door.

-60 below
Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica
New England's Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.

-80 below
Mt. St. Helen's freezes...
People in NE go ice skating or skiing.

-100 below
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.....
NE'ers get frustrated when they can't thaw the keg.

-297 below
Microbial life survives on dairy products....
Cows in NE complain of farmers with cold hands.

-460 below
ALL atomic motion stops.....
NE'ers start saying..."Cold 'nuff for ya?"

-500 below
Hell freezes over......
The Red Sox win the World Series!