More Blonde Jokes

[AmericanGirl]

A blonde was shopping at a Target Store and came across a silver
thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and
brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was. The clerk said, "Why,
that's a thermos.....it keeps some things hot and some things cold."
"Wow, said the blonde, "that's amazing....I'm going to buy it!" So she
bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on
her desk. "What's that,' he asked?" "Why, that's a thermos.....it keeps
hot things hot and cold things cold," she replied. Her boss inquired,
"What do you have in it?" The blond replied, "Two popsicles, and some
coffee."

----------------------------------------

Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in
movie? They went to see "Closed for the Winter."

--------------------------------------------------

Why did the blonde resolve to have only 3 children? She heard that one
out of every four children born in the world was Chinese.

-------------------------------------------------

A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with the tip of
her index finger shot off. "How did this happen?" the emergency room
doctor asked. "Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde
replied. "What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by
shooting your finger off?" "No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put
the gun to my chest, and I thought: I just had $6,000.00 for these
breast implants, I'm not shooting myself in the chest. "So then?" asked
the doctor. "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid
$3000.00 to get my teeth straightened, I'm not shooting myself in the
mouth. "So then?" "Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is
going to make a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before
I pulled the trigger."

--------------------------------------------------

Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall? There was a power
outage, and twelve blondes were stuck on the escalators for over four
hours.

-------------------------------------------------

A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really bad
hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it
to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he
decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow into the
tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So, the blonde
went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her
tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, and still
nothing happen. Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What
are you doing?" The first blonde told her how the repairman had
instructed her to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents
to pop out. The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Uh, like hello! You
need to roll up the windows first."

---------------------------------------------------

A blonde went to an eye doctor to have her eyes checked for glasses.
The doctor directed her to read various letters with the left eye while
covering the right eye. The blonde was so mixed up on which eye was
which that the eye doctor, in disgust, took a paper lunch bag with a
hole to see through, covered up the appropriate eye and asked her to
read the letters. As he did so, he noticed the blonde had tears
streaming down her face. "Look," said the doctor, "there's no need to
get emotional about getting glasses." "I know," agreed the blonde, "But
I kind of had my heart set on wire frames!

[rabbid37]

Ahhh....those blondes.....lol

[MACTANK]

A blonde in a Cadillac was driving to the narket when another car came out of a parking lot, and she hit the brakes to no avail. She slid head on into the intruding vehicle and she eventually awakened in the Emergency room of the nearby Hospital.

The Police Investigator came to pay a visit and ask some questions. He told her that he was glad that her injuries were minor, and began to ask her what had happened. After she had explained everything, he asked "How did lipstick wind up all over the steering wheel?"

She looked up and said.... "Officer, when I saw the car come out in front of me, I was trying to blow the horn, but it didn't work"

[Navy6064]

..

[Rusty24]

So I put my finger in the other ear before
I pulled the trigger."

[brooklyn6]

lolol

Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall? There was a power outage, and twelve blondes were stuck on the escalators for over four hours.

[Batgirl]

[Turtledrive]

I thought that there were only five blonde jokes because the rest of them are true.