Home Portal Blog Links
Go Back   Military Forum > Military Community > Military Clubs > The Fouled Anchor

The Fouled Anchor Join Old Salt for funny military jokes, stories.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-12-2006, 09:29 AM   #1 (permalink)
Marine

 
SpongeJuan's Avatar
 
Group:
Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps

SpongeJuanMarine is SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Beaufort
Posts: 1,293
Threads: 63
UserID: 549
User Info
United_States  marine_corps  male  virgo  

Military_Support
My current mood: Overworked
Reputation +/-Power: 6
Points: 26
SpongeJuan is on a distinguished road
SpongeJuanMarine is SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Perfect timing

A husband wakes up with a huge hangover the night after a business function.

He forces himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a
couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose.

The husband sits up in bed and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order,
spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror and notices a note on the table: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper.

His son is also at the table, eating. The husband asks, "Son . . .
what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 am, drunk and out of your mind. You broke the coffee table, puked in the hallway and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

The husband asks, "So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh, THAT! . . . Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, bitch, I'm married!!'!"

Broken table--$200

Hot breakfast--$5

Red rose bud--$3

Two aspirins--$.25

Saying the right thing, at the right time . . . PRICELESS
SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2006, 09:42 AM   #2 (permalink)

Marine

Semper Fi!
knucklehead

 
Grimmy's Avatar
 
Group:
Staff Advisor

GrimmyMember is Grimmy isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
AKA: Mac
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: California
Posts: 6,391
Threads: 428
UserID: 189
User Info
United_States  marine_corps  male  pisces  chinese_buffalo

Patriotism
My current mood: Grumpy
Reputation +/-Power: 24
Points: 1334
Grimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud ofGrimmy has much to be proud of
GrimmyMember is Grimmy isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing

Lol!!

-Mac


Grimmy's Sig:Our country! in her intercourse with foreign nations may she always be in the right; but our country right or wrong!! ... Stephen Decatur, Toast

Grimmy isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-12-2006, 09:14 PM   #3 (permalink)
Senior Member
Old Salt

 
Navy6064's Avatar
 
Group:
Sr. Infantrymen General

Navy6064Special Member is Navy6064 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: US
Posts: 22,947
Threads: 4588
UserID: 6
User Info
United_States  navy  male  aquarius  chinese_snake

USA_Support
My current mood: Happy
Reputation +/-Power: 42
Points: 1246
Navy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud ofNavy6064 has much to be proud of
Navy6064Special Member is Navy6064 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing

lol


Navy6064's Sig:
Navy6064 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-14-2006, 08:05 AM   #4 (permalink)
Marine

 
SpongeJuan's Avatar
 
Group:
Sergeant Major of the Marine Corps

SpongeJuanMarine is SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Beaufort
Posts: 1,293
Threads: 63
UserID: 549
User Info
United_States  marine_corps  male  virgo  

Military_Support
My current mood: Overworked
Reputation +/-Power: 6
Points: 26
SpongeJuan is on a distinguished road
SpongeJuanMarine is SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing

I laughed so hard when I read this joke
SpongeJuan isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-15-2006, 04:50 PM   #5 (permalink)
Navy
CPOMA Royal Navy (Rtd)

 
Donald's Avatar
 
Group:
Master Chief Petty Officer of the Navy

DonaldNavy is Donald isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
AKA: Doc
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Scotland
Posts: 2,181
Threads: 15
UserID: 2078
User Info
  navy  male    

Autism
Reputation +/-Power: 5
Points: 48
Donald is on a distinguished road
DonaldNavy is Donald isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing

Lol

-Doc
Donald isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2006, 07:34 AM   #6 (permalink)

Soldier Support


 
AngelBear's Avatar
 
Group:
Support Staff
AngelBearSupport is AngelBear isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
AKA: Julane
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Katy, Texas
Posts: 15,823
Threads: 226
UserID: 19
User Info
United_States  supporter  female  scorpio  chinese_buffalo

Military_Support
My current mood: Bitchy
Reputation +/-Power: 25
Points: 515
AngelBear is a glorious beacon of lightAngelBear is a glorious beacon of lightAngelBear is a glorious beacon of lightAngelBear is a glorious beacon of lightAngelBear is a glorious beacon of lightAngelBear is a glorious beacon of light
AngelBearSupport is AngelBear isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing


-Julane


AngelBear's Sig:
You too Brian!
AngelBear isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 09-25-2006, 01:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
Navy

 
brooklyn6's Avatar
 
Group:
Fleet/Command Master Chief Petty Officer

12yrs+ Good Conduct
brooklyn6Navy is brooklyn6 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)
AKA: Tina
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Nyc
Posts: 1,687
Threads: 63
UserID: 16
User Info
United_States  support_mia_pow  female  scorpio  chinese_rat

Military_Support
My current mood: Sarcastic
Reputation +/-Power: 8
Points: 211
brooklyn6 has a spectacular aura aboutbrooklyn6 has a spectacular aura aboutbrooklyn6 has a spectacular aura about
brooklyn6Navy is brooklyn6 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  

Re: Perfect timing

lolol

-Tina
brooklyn6 isimli üyemiz çevrimdışıdır. (Offline)  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote

Sponsored Links

» Support the Site!

Military Gear - Military Ltd Gear - Infantrymen Gear - Ranger Gear - Single Servicemen
Reply

Tags
perfect, timing



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
The Timing Of The Iraqi Air Force Memo Grimmy The Military Press 0 04-09-2006 03:07 AM
A Pure And Perfect Poison Grimmy The Military Press 1 03-04-2006 04:14 AM
Wanted: completely perfect legs.. Navy6064 Between the Lines! 2 08-27-2005 11:12 AM
Girl pitches perfect game against boys SSGMike.Ivy The Sports Den 0 05-19-2005 10:28 PM
The Perfect Man & Perfect Woman Navy6064 The Fouled Anchor 5 04-07-2005 12:03 AM


New To The Site? Need Information?

 

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.0 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd., SEO by vBSEO 3.1.0
Designed by MilitaryDesign.Com
MilitaryLtd.com, GoInfantry.Com, Infantrymen.Net, Infantrymen's Military Forum are © 2000-2008 MilitaryLtd.Com. All Rights Reserved.
Any copying, redistribution or retransmission of any of the contents or images without express written consent is expressly prohibited.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253